Cops: Marion, Iowa

Every place has that town, you know, that one where the cops are seemingly everywhere, almost too the point of random harassment. In the Cedar Rapids metro that town is Marion. A long standing joke with us and probably others in the area is that you cannot drive through Marion without seeing a police car. It's the truth, try it sometime, it's impossible.

The Marion PD always have someone pulled over. One night it was one of those tailgating buses. This particular bus had a giant wind shield, the kind you would see on a semi, and one that windshield one of the most creative pieces of art I have ever witnessed. It had the Iowa State Patrol logo in giant size, only instead of saying "Iowa State Patrol" it said "Team Party Patrol." That and the bus had a giant Playboy bunny painted on the side. It was totally tits. The other night though, that vehicle that was pulled over was us. Of course this was approximately, oh, 3 seconds after Michelle said "you better watch your speed, we are in Marion."

Now one would think, why in the hell would the fun-loving Flores Bunch be pulled over on the side of the road in Marion, IA. Were they speeding? Recklessly driving? Booze-cruising? Possession of narcotics with intent to deliver? Raping and pillaging?

The answer to all of the above is in fact, no. What pray-tell did we do then? Effectively we were guilty of driving dirty car. That's right, we got pulled over on our way to dinner on a Friday night because Officer Smith was bored and couldn't see the registration tags on our license plate. Not that he couldn't read the license plate, but that he couldn't see the tags. We promised to wash our car and were released from our minutes long ordeal on our own recognizance. We were lucky that he didn't search the trunk, because he may have discovered the rust on my ice skates!

Cops suck! Feel free to post good stories about why cops lick defrosted monkey poop.

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Quote of the day:

"Gotta bill in my mouth like I'm Hillary Rodham" - Ali from Grillz, by Nelly

The visuals on that are just not good.

New Year's Resolutions

This year one of my resolutions was to keep in better touch with all the friends I have made during the course of my life. The original intent was to email or call, but me being busy, and/or lazy, depending on who you ask (cough, cough, intensity_too :) ), haven't really kept up with that resolution to well. Today though, Ray-Ray emailed me and asked how we've been. It was then that I realized that, damn, there's been a lot of news associated with us and people we know over the last six months. I know some of you read this, but yet I hear not from you. I learned of Gene and Erin's move to Chicago from a comment on a post about wine. So if you are on this list, write, call, take a picture, do something. Note, I am using full names here so if those who aren't regular readers happen to Google themselves maybe they will be drawn to this proverbial needle in the haystack.

Dan and Michelle Bailey
Gene and Erin Bailey
Ryan Wilkins
Nathan Zeidler
Josh Knorovski
Andy Stonewall
Andrew Stone
Jake Colehour
Corey Montgomery
Big Al of the Hick Squad(oops, can't remember your last name all of a sudden)
Mike and Kerry Dahm
Nicole Streit
Phil Delgado
JW Clark
Angie and Matt Kennedy
Rachel Pabon
Gabe Phillips

Now, I know I probably missed some folks, but if you are someone who talks to me on a semi-regular basis then I probably left you off the list (Jones', D, Blake). Otherwise, if you know me and want to drop a line, you can always leave a comment.

Now the trap is set, I will sit and let them come to me.

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"And I get more ass than a toilet seat" - Nate Dogg

Just thought I'd throw that out there. Peace.

Writers block

I've been sitting here trying to write a post, but not much is coming to me. I was going to write about how you should never, ever, ever buy knock off Cheetos (which is true, trust me), but the inspiration wasn't really striking me with that one. I also considered writing about how I am excited to get an Xbox 360 when that comes in, but again, no deep relevations besides the astouding coolness off the machine struck as good to write about.

That's about all I have right now, feeling rather blase right now. Everyone is healthy and happy.

PS Check out the new banner Gene sent us.

Hey Joe

Date: Sometime in 2018
Situation: Uncle Chris encounters nephew Joe hanging with his squad/posse/girlfriend(s)/pet rock.

C: Hey Joe!
J: Yeah.
C: Do you remember the time...
J: (Turning red and trying to escape)
C: ...when you were 4 and you cried because I somewhat sternly insisted that, no, I would not permit you to rub your buckassnekkid ass on me?

s/p/g/pr: (Laughing like hyena(s) )

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Yeah, being an uncle can be cool.